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1. | Over two weeks of no Casey. Still seems pretty bizarre. I was making a ham sandwich in the kitchen the other day and I am so used to a cat under my feet wailing. And then I would give her a little piece. We have done that for years and it was so weird to not have a 'helper'. Mackie was there, too, but he is younger and always been part of a group. Casey was alone for a few years, so we have lots of traditions.

2. | I have been looking at kittens. It is probably too soon, and part of me feels guilty about it, but we do not want to replace Casey. We need another cat because Finn all alone just doesn't work. He is not cuddly or all that friendly. I need a cuddly cat. This has derailed my project to convince the other human I needed another dog... The kitten project is going better than the dog project anyway. Just, no one answers emails. Do you want to re-home these animals or not?

3. | I bought a new bookcase! I am ridiculously happy about this fact because it is has probably been 5 years since I have bought a new one. It sits on the landing and helped me finish off my organising from earlier this year. It holds some beloved series/authors and the random books I got for my birthday. I am sure that will change with time, but I think it looks good.

4. | I have been thinking a lot about Canada as a whole lately between the scary political situation in the US and the fact that I am reading The Promise of Canada. It covers 150 years of Canadian history in preparation for Canada's 150th birthday in July. We have treated people terribly over the years. But, I think we are doing better. What has me thinking is I really like this book, but I have yet to see it on any of the best of lists all ready out. And, I am left thinking is it because others do not consider it to be that great or because it is about Canada and most lists are American. There was a whole chapter on Margaret Atwood and how hard it can be to be a Canadian writer. Still early days and I definitely haven't seen all the lists. Just a thought.

5. | I have a cold, so my reading has been kind of slow. I am left choosing between nap and try to feel better or read. Hopefully the cold passes soon!

6. | I think I have bought more e-books in 2016 than I have ever. It is hard to pass up a book you were planning to get when it is like 2 dollars and the hardcover edition is like 30. I still forget about my e-books when I have shiny books on my physical shelves catching my eye. I think I have a project for 2017.

1. | Another post a week later with no Casey. I called all the vets and shelters and nothing. I keep getting told that cats wander all the time, and my cats when I was a kid did, but this is the first time Casey has ever been gone for more than a few hours and I am losing hope.

2. | Still struggling with reading. I know that reading should be an escape from everything else, but I have always had a really hard time reading when I am stressed out. I just cannot turn my mind off and always feel like I should be doing something else.

3. | My Q&A a Day Journal arrived yesterday! I looked at starting it yesterday, but maybe I will wait and start it November 1st. Or, maybe I should have waited and got it in the New Year. Or, maybe I should stop overthinking things and just start it today. I hope I can keep it up. I only got it because I have been keeping up my Bullet Journal and other projects, so I figured I was safe. I still do my day by day journal that I started in 2012 and always enjoy looking back on what I did on this day in previous years.

4. | I had a lot of fun during the Readathon co-hosting the Instagram account. People take such great photos and there were lots of furry companions. I enjoyed visiting everyone and all ready volunteered for next year. Hope to see people then!

5. | My grandmother's house is on the market. A bit of a sad situation because it is closing off an aspect of my childhood, but it will be much better to have her closer to my mother and in an environment that if she falls again there is help close by. Not that we want her to fall again, but I know that she is really paranoid it will happen again.

6. | I am still continuing my 'pick random audios from Scribd' project. I started off really well, but the latest one I just could not find time to listen to it and I felt like I read it forever. I am ready to pick a new one, though! Just have to decide what I want to go with... I am still adjusting to listening at regular speed. When I do Audible audios, I speed them up or I find that I lose interest.

7. | I am going to document right here that I started my project to listen to the Vorksogian series by Lois McMaster Bujold having started Falling Free. I will be curious if a year from now I will be done the series, or if it will by my typical take forever project that never gets completed... We will see!

8. | This post isn't as depressing as last weeks. I still probably should take a blogging break and try to get my head together after everything that has happened this month, but I just got back into a groove with blogging and I would be worried I wouldn't be able to get it back... What I really need is a fun project to take my mind off all the stress. (I am not going to lie, at least two times while writing this post I thought I heard a cat cry. I am losing my mind!)

Last Picture of her just before she went out on Monday.

1. | As I write this, Thursday night, we still have not found Casey. I hope I edit this post tomorrow (or today as you are reading this) and say she came home. I feel so sick about it all. I have checked outside so many times, I am getting nothing else done. I am just worried because she could still come back, but there is the possibility that she won't. I am trying to stay positive, but it's hard. Over the last 5 years or so, Casey has been my one constant. I love Mackie and Finn, too, but we got Casey first. It is not a good feeling to open the door and her still not be there...

2. | So, the readathon is this weekend. I won't be reading for it officially, but I have been posting at the Instagram account and plan to over the weekend as well! I look forward to seeing what everyone reads and visiting some blogs! It is such a huge event now. I know I have said this before, but the first couple readathons I visited every blog participating and usually more than once. Now I find it overwhelming! Hope everyone has lots of fun!

3. | I got an insane amount of books in the mail on Wednesday. It was crazy. I think the mail gods decided that I needed a pick me up when Casey still wasn't back and the worrying got worse... Only one parcel said it was out for delivery and some of the books were not supposed to be here until November. I am not complaining, but you need to space orders out or other humans start noticing. lol And, I guess my whole mood is making reading even harder right now. (Not going to lie, I teared up when I wrote the first paragraph...)

4. | I think I mentioned on a previous post, or somewhere on my blog, that my grandmother had fallen? Well, things are better there. She honestly could not maintain a house alone anymore and she was 2 and a half hours from my mother. After some thought, she is moving to an apartment closer to my mother. It is another bittersweet thing, really. My dad's parents passed away like 15 years ago and my mom's mom is really the only grandparent I got a good chunk of time with. I think my October has had enough bad things happen in it and it is not over yet...

5. | Finn is missing Casey, too. He camps out by the door most of the day. He hated when she went outside before, but he has never wanted to go out himself. When I look for Casey I have Mackie and Finn standing on the doorstep with me. I feel really bad for him. He adored Casey and I doubt he knows what is happening. I wonder when he will get to a point that he stops waiting for her? We always call Casey the Queen because Mackie and Finn definitely know that she is the boss. I am a bad owner lately. Two days now I have forgot to feed Finn and Mackie supper because Casey wasn't here to tell me it was time. You just get used to something and then get thrown off when it is not there.

6. | I am struggling with reading. I haven't been listening to my audios or reading anything the last couple days. I am too distracted. I am starting to think my lofty post of audios I wanted to read next, that I posted on Tuesday, was crazy because I have been listening to the same two audios for like 2 weeks now. I need to get my head back in the game. I have been stressed in general and this whole cat thing is not helping. But, on Tuesday my house was clean and I got a bunch of reading done. I had high hopes that day for the rest of the week.

7. | I am starting to think I should take a blogging break because my posts are boring and depressing lately...